The Time cover has recently garnered all sorts of attention for the young mom nursing her four-year-old son, who is standing on a chair. I'll be honest and say that I don't understand nursing a child that long. But I won't berate or insult them, that's for sure. I don't expect anyone to question my parenting methods. After all, I'm the best mom for my son and have his best interest at heart. So while I don't understand nursing a child that long, I won't pretend to know what's best for that child or that family.
With that being said, my biggest issue with that shocking cover is not the photo itself, it's the caption. "Are you Mom Enough?" Time, how dare you?!?! How dare you question my "mom-ness!" How dare you imply, or even flat-out state, that moms who nurse long-term are "more" mom or better than me! I will never deny that breast milk is best and has healthy attributes for newborns. But let me tell you, Time, I have done the absolute best for my son possible.
My story regarding breast feeding is something I'll share without hesitation or shame. My husband and I decided before we had our son that we would nurse him. The goal was six months, possibly a year. My husband was very sweet, supportive, and understanding. He told me it was my decision how long to do it. We both understood that the colostrum at the beginning is extremely critical and possibly the most important aspect of breast milk. I started nursing our sweet boy shortly after birth. It wasn't intuitive or simple for me or our son. But we worked through it.
I went to a lactation consultant within a week of getting home because Jackson was losing weight. We got it figured out, though. I went to a weekly breastfeeding support group. Sometimes, it was frustrating hearing how some women would just gush or how much they could pump after a feeding. I weighed my son before and after feeding him each meeting. Sometimes he would only get a couple of ounces, even after nursing on both sides. I tried the teas, the supplements, anything to help increase my supply.
But after two months of nursing, my doctor and I agreed that he wasn't getting sufficient nourishment from my breast milk. So we began supplementing with formula. It was a huge relief of stress for me, for my husband, and for my little one's tummy. It was so hard sometimes not knowing how much he was eating. After all, breasts don't have striations indicating how much a knucklehead is eating! At four months, I quit nursing altogether and switched to formula entirely. My husband and I discussed it first. Nursing was becoming more of a frustration because of my extremely low supply. But guess what? My son didn't object at all! He easily switched back and forth between the breast and bottle. He easily switched back and forth between breast milk and formula. I didn't feel a lack of bonding when I quit nursing. I didn't even have the common issue of pain or leaking when I stopped, which just proved to me how little I was probably actually producing.
And my son is loving, affectionate, sweet, and happy. He rarely gets sick. So, Time, I AM "Mom Enough." I am "Mom Enough" to do what's best for my son and put his needs before my own. I am "Mom Enough" to put him on formula without feeling guilty. I am "Mom Enough" to make sure he's fed and full and happy and healthy. So put a mom loving her child at whatever cost on your cover. Not just one with a defiant look, hand on her hip, daring someone to challenge her to a milking contest.
God gave my son to me and me to my son, even though I didn't produce enough milk for him. And he's exactly who he's supposed to be and with whom he belongs. I am Mom Enough for Jackson. And I'll never apologize.
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